bad things that happen on the way back from J&SB

Right. Me, Lou and Megs watched Jay and Silent Bob. Credits featuring Afroman's Because I got High. Which we started perverting in the car, scarring Megs' bro + Dad in the process...

Got back. Spent time with me lying on sofa and her at computer composing verses for the other characters, whilst on AIM. The original verse is from 90 second LoTR... I'll remember the addy in a sec... we just extrapolated. With apologies to Cassandra Claire and Tolkien. oops.

in order of appearance and insane inspiration :

Gandalf the original, Gandalf Strikes Back, Boromir, Aragorn, Sauron, Gimli, Frodo, Pippin, Merry, Legolas, Ringwraiths and Sam. We may come up with something for Elrond, Gollum and Galadriel, but the supply of drugs has been cut off. :pouts:

I was gonna go research the Ring
But then I got high.
I was gonna destroy the bloody thing
But then I got high.
Now the world is in imminent danger
And I know why.
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna lead them through the mines of Moria,
But then I got high.
I was gonna make the balrog sorrier
But then I got high
Now I've fallen into shadow
and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna resist the ring
But then I got high.
get in some more hobbit groping
But then I got high.
Now I've been killed by Orcs
and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was destined to be king
But then I got high.
Was gonna ditch this Strider thing
But then I got high.
Now I'm engaged to an elf twit
and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna kick Isildur's arse
But then I got high.
was gonna leave his torture til last
But then I got high.
now I'm missing a finger and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna be L'Oreal sponsored
But then I got high.
Was gonna have my beard all tonsured
But then I got high.
Now I'm fancying elves
and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna have a quiet life
But then I got high.
Was gonna have it free of strife
But then I got high.
Now everyone's hitting on me and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna learn to fight
But then I got high.
Was gonna succumb to Boromir's might
But then I got high.
Now I'm blowing his horn of Gondor
and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna keep my carrot intact
But then I got high.
Was gonna grope Frodo, that's a fact
But then I got high.
Now I'm being carried off by orcs
and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

I was gonna redo my roots
But then I got high.
I'm the prettiest, that fact's moot
But then I got high.
Now I suffer from split ends and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.

We were gonna reclaim the ring,
But then we got high.
We were gonna get the bloody thing
But then we got high.
Now we're being washed away by a river and we know why
Because we got high, because we got high,
Because we got high.

I was gonna worship Mr Frodo
But then I got high.
Was gonna make Aragorn dead as a dodo
But then I got high.
Now I'm off to bloody Mordor and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high,
Because I got high.