You had plenty money 1922

Tempest 2/6/13

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Midsummer Night's Dream 8/6/13

(with added first timers Cathy and Gideon. Who did squee dutifully. I do like making converts to the cause. Only downside being that Gideon now keeps calling me 'Puppet' due to the plethora of short jokes. And it was full, and there were other tall people, so quite a bit of shifting in groundlings to see stuff)

Costuming - most everyone in Renaissance, the fairies in browns and greens and leather and furs and body paint, either stripped to the waist or minimalist bodices, lots of stag and horns and
skull headdresses. v. much Wild Hunt-ish.

Oh my Bard. This play. This fucking play. THIS WAS BRILLIANT.

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Kiss Me Kate @ Old Vic , 18/01. it was awesome, if not a little fucked up in relationships. interesting to see where the songs went, and everyone trying to steal the show from everyone else, which was actually completely in character. Only real problem was the actress playing Bianca was... not quite there with the rest. I dunno, just didn't fit. rather good stage design and costuming too - all black and white clever things with banners for the play.

Bro's wedding: family, food, *other* family, small children behaving themselves, the sheer speed Chelsea Old Town Hall puts through weddings, pretty dresses, and unbelievably hungover the next morning. Seriously. the waitresses were making sympathetic noises.

If You Don't Let Us Dream, We Won't Let You Sleep @ Royal Court 09/03 - play about debt. where society is going, companies trying to monetarise it whilst the entire audience sat there and winced because it's all too true. I'd call it a question raising play - it didn't try to provide the answers (it specifically stated it wasn't trying to, idiot critics who weren't listening) but it did show us all the questions we should be asking. Possibly yelling.

Stage door: I was first out, but as the crowds amassed, i turned and asked 'okay, who *isn't* here for Damien Moloney?' Lots of shuffling of feet and coughing. Anyway. Crowd all terribly patient and polite, Damien utterly lovely and answering questions and posing for pics for everyone. and yes he'd like to do a musical.

In other news: weather, can it be spring sometime soon? not suddenly taking a dip and snowing again?

Oh, shush, yes, I saw this twice. once for... testing purposes. quality control. :sideye: it was a new Matthew Bourne. Quality control is *important*. And the others needed a guide the second time around.

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I Bronze'd at the RA as it was the last couple of days - some utterly stunning, magical work let down by unbelievably crappy labelling - seriously, who puts tiny 6" labels at waist height when you've got giant wall space behind it all? The moment anyone stood in front of a sculpture, bye-bye goes the label. You could see people getting visibly frustrated at having to hunt for the label that would a) tell them what it was and b) give some rather nice context notes.

MUSEUM PEOPLE: IMAGINE YOUR GALLERY IS FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH PEOPLE. LABEL ACCORDINGLY. (there's these computer imaging programs if your imagination is seriously that crappy) NOT EVERYONE WANTS THE AUDIO.

Some utterly amazing pieces - the giant satyr, the Etruscan shadow/solstice piece that shows *exactly* where Giacometti got his influences, the 3m high John the Baptist and friends, the Chinese wine vat for parties in the shape of a ... I think it was a pig, don't quote me, the Remington piece of five cowboy riders where it looked like they were flying, (with added Remington's notes with him crowing on the technical marvel he'd been able to pull off - six feet on the floor, ten in the air. BEAT THAT.), the northern european sun disc worship pieces, the turn of the century life-size Dutch peasant who was so wonderfully, quietly dignified, an amazing bronze-marble-enamel victorian Jewess, the boar whose nose was shiny because people touch it for luck, the *gorgeous* Benin heads, the Japanese incense and oil burner (3m tall, 2m wide), the Barbara Hepworth that everyone stopped in front of and sighed 'lovely', and that's just off the top of my head. Some where you were going 'bor-ing'. Too many Hercules and centaur bloke who was carrying off his fiancée. A very static Michael and devil.

Very amusing bits - I love how people grade stuff in these exhibitions by 'so, which pieces would you nick, given the chance?' (lots of people contemplating that they could probably get the Etruscan piece down their trousers and one of the Benin heads in their bag without too many problems) Me spreading the 'a lot of classical female sculptures? the models are boys that they then stuck tits on' and the woman next to me turning round and pointing at another piece and going 'case in point, look at those hips' to her friend and all of us smirking and saying as one 'the Medusa in the first room? Definitely the Medusa.'

As ever, beyond postcards and a nice book, the RA fails on souvenir stuff. the very expensive jewellery and silk scarves are lovely, but seriously, go to Trafalgar Square, RA merchandise people, and look at what the National Gallery produces for its exhibitions. You're missing out on so much wonga in your inability to produce notebooks, brollies, magnets, cute badges, mugs, toys, and simple jewellery.

Whilst I was in there, they announced that James McAvoy was going to be playing Macbeth in February at the Trafalgar Studios, and my feed was filled with people going 'got my tickets' when I got out of the gallery. Cue me hustling it to Trafalgar Square for tickets. They hadn't released any more cheap ones past press night, so thanked my lucky stars that I found some theatre tokens in my wallet and got one for Valentine's Day. Now just waiting to see what take they're going to do on it, considering Macbeth is my utter weakness and loving the setting of Michelin-starred chef they did for the BBC Shakespeare Re-told plays they did a few years back. (McAvoy as Macbeth, Keeley Hawes as Lady Macbeth, Richard Armitage as Macduff) Seriously, the concept of the witches being binmen is one of the best choices for them ever.

Southbank market was done, presents were bought, possibly worst Gluhwein *ever* - seriously, hot ribena would've been more alcoholic and less sugary - and I managed to get mustard from the bratwurst up my nose. Don't ask. The leather bracelet bloke saw me coming. dammit. Overall quite nice. No coffee. :narrows eyes: The only problem I really have is the fact that a few years ago they handed it over to the package german market people, which means all the good food stalls went (they used to have pieminster and awesome burger places). Fortunately tastebuds rescued by the chocolate festival being on round the back of the Royal Festival Hall. Work people currently thoughtfully working their way through salt caramel chocolate covered biccies from Artisan du Chocolat.

I went to see Arthur Darvill, Lawrence Fox, Neville from Harry Potter and a bunch of other people in Our Boys a drama set in a military hospital ward for soldiers recovering from injury. Varied between the hysterical and nail bitingly-'augh'. Really good performances. Also, Amy, Rory and the Doctor *so* played 'Beerhunter' on the TARDIS.

Cabaret with Will Young: OMG. GO SEE. Will as the Emcee - it's... he plays it as a permanently smiling, doll-like thing who is *completely dead behind the eyes*. Fucking creepy as hell. also, the boy can dance. You know how Joel Grey essentially set the mould for the Emcee? This is the first time I've seen it played differently enough that you can differentiate. Michelle Ryan as Sally - she can sing, she can dance... it's just she's not a very convincing Sally. Too healthy Chelsea girl, no sense whatsoever that she's supposed to be a complete mess. Matt Rawle is being Matt Rawle(*) as the american writer. Sian Phillips is wondrous and lovely and nearly steals the show as Fraulein Schneider in her old-age romance with the Jewish grocer. The audience was audibly going 'awwww' during their scenes, and whimpering when the nazis intrude. You could also see them glaring at Sally's relationship drama. Do not care. Taking time away from the old people romance. *so* much better than Honor Blackman was in 2006. Interesting directorial note - the entirety of 'Don't tell Mamma' is done as a backdrop to a conversation backstage - you're backstage and they're behind the bead curtain performing to the 'audience' at the back wall. Javier de Frutos' choreography was stunning (mein herr especially) and Tomorrow Belongs to Me? Emcee doing a puppet show. GAH.

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Nano, due to a shit writing weekend, I'm about 2k behind on but fingers crossed.

Obama won. THANKYOU, America.

(*)For those not familiar with Matt Rawle, imagine gruff, unshaven, larynx has been cheesegrated voice, bit of a rogue. Seriously good actor, great voice, it's just that he gets typecast. A lot. As a worldly cynic who really does want to believe. Previous roles: Che in Evita, Zorro in Zorro.

Rightio, this is 3 of Bourne's early pieces, pre-Swan Lake *and* Nutcracker - Spitfire, Town and Country and The Infernal Galop. to quote the terrible pun in one review I saw, The Bourne Origin.
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Hamlet:

Young Vic 18th Feb, Michael Sheen as Hamlet, Vinette Robinson as Ophelia, other people I will, er, add when I can find a cast list....

All round, v good performances. bit brain breaking as it's set in a mental asylum, and it's made very clear that Hamlet is one of the most nuts from the start. Which sadly makes me grit my teeth even more - I want to give the character a good kicking all through Acts 1 and 2 at the best of times (act 3, when he's stopped acting like such a little self-entitled shit, just about bearable). This? Stick him in a woodchipper, especially during the play when he just goes too far.

Nice notes: Polonius being paranoid as hell in a genial way and constantly recording everything and reassuring people he's recording everything. Ophelia playing a lap harp to communicate when she's really gone off her rocker. Gertrude and Claudius being in much smarter clothing and seeming much more together than everyone else to create the illusion of court. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern being... basically visiting social workers or Salvation Army people, from what I could tell of their dress. The ghost is Hamlet having a fit. Which actually makes a hell of a lot more sense for the character's motivations. Oh, and Fortinbras pulls off his helmet to reveal... Hamlet. Hellooooo extra level of headfuck.

Pre-play, they take you through the back, which has been made up to look like an institution - walls, bits of luggage, labels, schedules, rooms designated 'treatment', gymnasium, tiny blood smears, bored guards... They've done the back wall so it's glass doors and you can see into the entrance/reception and incomers like R&G get searched as they come in. Any conversations about Fortinbras approaching are the guards commenting on news on the tv in the reception. Same for Hamlet listening in on Claudius' discussions with R&G through the radio when they're in the reception area. Combine with warning sirens, emergency lighting, and announcements over the tannoy. Oh, and the stage, they lift up a giant portion to reveal a sandpit underneath in Act 3 for the gravedigger scene. then they fall into it during the fencing - which doesn't really make sense until they push all the dead bodies into it, cover it with a tarpaulin... which enables a quick change so they can come in tac gear as Fortinbras' men.

Surprisingly, very few films - Eagle, Captain America, Thor, X-men:First Class, Jane Eyre and Tinker Tailor are the only ones I remember going to see, aside from a couple of National Theatre live viewings.

Went to several BBC radio recordings - mostly John Finnemore focussed. (him behind Cabin Pressure)

Theatre - A *lot*. Globe for Much Ado, All's Well and Dr Faustus, Betty Blue Eyes, Haunted Child, Ladykillers, Soho Cinders, a few concerts here and there for new writing, Matthew Bourne's Cinderella twice, Some Like It Hip Hop, Flare Path, Macbeth, all-male Iolanthe, Vernon God Little, and ordinary days. er. i think that's all of it...

Fic written:

What if The Authority was picked up by HBO for a tv series: We Want to Save the World But We Need a Drink First
My Matthew Bourne Obsession Is Showing : An Eagle of the Ninth Billy Elliot/Step Up AU, Culture is Never Wasted

Soho Cinders.

aka Stiles and Drewe *finally* sodding finish a show they premiered the first batch of songs and story for it at their anniversary bash a few years ago*, and stage it in concert-ish form with unbelievable names for charity. Cue most of the West End Wendys and half the gay community turning up. (oh, including one Mr. Stephen Fry who was clearly running late, who turned up at the theatre running at full tilt at 7, dodging through the crowd outside the theatre and into the bar to meet up with his boyfriend and some mates.)

As you may have guessed, it's a modern take on Cinderella. Set in Soho. Cinders = Robbie (Jos Slovick), a student who does side work as an escort who's seeing the Mayoral Candidate, James Prince (Michael Xavier). Who is engaged and is running his campaign on, er, honesty and no sleaze. Add: The candidate's fiancée, Marilyn (Hannah Waddingham), William George (David Bedella), Prince's campaign manager who is a bastard of the first order, Sasha his put-upon assistant (Richard David-Caine), Velcro (Amy Lennox), Robbie's best mate who runs a laundrette, Lord Bellingham (Clive Carter), one of Robbie's regular customers and a funder of the campaign, Clodagh (Suzie Chard) and Dana (Beverly Rudd), Robbie's vile stepsisters who run a titty bar, and Chelle (Sharon Clarke), a rickshaw cyclist. And a chorus of clubgoers, Soho tradesmen, the press and beautiful people.

And to top it off, Sandi Toksvig as the Narrator. Who as is the right of Ms. Toksvig, was fabulous, sarcastic, had a very large book and did look over the top of her spectacles at us. And we were grateful for the opportunity to be condescended to.

Anyway. It's about political spin, sleaze, falling in love with the people you shouldn't, and dreams for something just that little bit better. The shoe is Robbie's phone that he leaves behind at a fundraising party. With some of the best music Stiles and Drewe have ever written, and a so sharp it'll cut you book and songs containing some of the best belly laughs ever. (seriously, the Stepsisters' song 'I'm so Over Men' had to re-recorded at the end due to the audience laughing too hard). I'm serious about the songs. there's a song about internet dating, Gypsies of the Ether which is one of the most gorgeous love songs ever. And Velcro and Marilyn's song about not settling for second best, Let Him Go, was heart breaking. The only problem is that it's *so* site-specific that you don't know if it could sustain a decent run - most of the jokes and dialogue are a) London and b) theatre and gay culture. All the acting was brilliant - Robbie just sweet enough, Velcro scatty, Marilyn absolutely composed, James torn and somehow still noble, George completely skin crawling. A couple of the songs need tweaking a bit, and the loose ends were tied up by people running on stage at the very end with 'guess what' in the spirit of panto, but otherwise we nearly deafened 'em when it came to cheering at the bows.

*In which Robbie was played by Gareth Gates, miked to the hilt, and James Prince by Oliver Tompsett. One day we will get Daniel Boys to play Robbie. he's said he wants to.