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burntcopperSome bastard planted in my head the idea that Grodin was ex-UNIT. Evil scum. Cross-posted all over the place.
Title : Fairly Different on First Impressions
Author : Gunbunny
E-Mail : kabukivice@beeb.net
Fandom : SG:A/Dr Who
Pairing : well, er, there's ones hinted at.
Rating : No sex and no swearing. Am slipping.
Summary : Grodin really wishes he could escape his old job sometimes.
Disclaimer : Not mine. There's this American tv channel, and this corporation called the BBC, and this man called Russell T Davies who we fall at the feet of...
Feedback : I accept burnt offerings and alcohol.
Archive : http://kabukivice.com/fic , anywhere else feel free.
Grodin's in the middle of inhaling the scent of something Stackhouse's team brought in on their last mission. It's not tea, exactly, but it's as close to it as they've found. More Lady Grey than Darjeeling, but you can't have everything. One of his lot actually craves Tetley's, but they obviously have deformed tastebuds, since they're also well-known to crave Tizer. He couldn't really care less about the coffee that the science team craves, but he's fairly sure he'd sell his soul for a decent ginger nut to go with his tea.
However, he's interrupted from his reverie by a call over the tannoy for a security team. "Um. An unidentified object has just appeared in the hangar bay. Requesting someone to come look at it, please?"
"Coming over." Bates replies. "What are we looking at?"
"A, uh, blue box. It just appeared out of thin air with a weird noise."
Grodin almost chokes on his tea on that, putting it down before he spills it. He reaches over to the comms button. "Tell me, does it have a sign saying 'police call box' on it? And windows? Looks rather old fashioned?"
"Er... yes?" Whoever's in the hangar bay says hesitantly.
Grodin groans. He thought he'd left this kind of thing back on Earth. "Stand down, Bates, it's not a threat." He reaches up and rubs his forehead, as he can feel a headache coming on.
"How can you be sure, sir?" Bates asks, obviously sceptical.
"I've had experience with it before. Long, arduous experience. I'd stay alert, though, as it occasionally means trouble is coming. I'm coming down." He gets up, picking up his tea as he goes. He needs at least some reassurance for his nerves.
When he gets down to the hangar, Bates and a couple of marines are there, guns trained on the Police box. Zelenka and McKay are there, as well as Sheppard, looking curious as hell. "What can you tell us?" McKay says. "I'm getting some really odd readings from it."
"Put the guns down, they won't do anything." Grodin sighs. Once they're down, he walks forward and knocks on the door of the box.
At that, it opens and a blonde girl pokes her head out, looking curious. "Hi, can we help?" London accent.
She's followed by an extremely handsome man, dark hair, all-American looks, complete with grin. He looks around. "So this is Atlantis. Interesting." He steps out of the box,
extending his hand to Grodin. "Captain Jack Harkness. This is Rose Tyler. Hi."
"Hello. Peter Grodin." Grodin shakes his hand, distinctly feeling Captain Jack rub his thumb over the back of his hand. "May I ask if the Doctor is with you?"
Rose jerks a hand back towards the inside of the TARDIS. "Last I saw he was making a cuppa."
Grodin swallows. "Real tea?"
"Earl Grey." She grins on seeing his hopeful look. "There's Jaffa Cakes too." Grodin swallows. Jaffa Cakes are just *unfair* to offer to someone who's been cut off from England for several months.
McKay peers around Rose. "How can you fit even a kettle in there? It's a phone booth."
"Appearances are deceiving." Jack says, grinning again at Grodin, then noticing Sheppard over the way and giving him a smile. Sheppard smiles back.
McKay rolls his eyes. "Oh, god, two Kirks in the same space. Will the universe ever survive?"
"Hoi! Jack's not Captain Kirk!" Rose objects. "He's just a tart."
"Not saying anything?" Sheppard asks Jack.
"I'm flexible." Jack grins.
"What're you lot chinwagging about out here?" A Mancunian voice says from inside the TARDIS.
"Oh, just Jack being friendly." Rose says.
The speaker comes forward, lounging in the doorway. "Sorry about that, he flirts with everyone." Tall, rangy, leather jacket and big ears. The last Doctor Grodin saw intel on was fairly short and distracted professorish in trilby and suit, had a ruthless and
calculating streak a mile wide. This one looks fairly different on first impressions, but it's definitely the Doctor. He looks round. "Atlantis looks to have changed a bit since I was last here."
"When was that, then?" Rose asks.
"Ancients were still here. Very boring people, too concerned with ascending rather'n living life. Wore a lot of beige." Grodin's eyes stray to the packet of Jaffa Cakes he's holding in one hand, and the Doctor notices. "Want one?" He asks cheerfully, holding them out.
"Please." Grodin says, pouncing immediately, dignity flying out the window.
McKay stares. "...Are those Jaffa Cakes?"
"Yep." The Doctor says. "Want one?"
McKay looks at them longingly, mournfully. "Can't. Citrus allergy." He looks thoughtful for a second. "You wouldn't happen to have Cadbury's Fruit and Nut, would you?"
Rose shrugs. "Might have."
"When we've finished discussing chocolate, I want to know who this is." Bates states.
"Oh, sorry." Grodin says, emerging from his reverie over the Jaffa Cakes. "This is the Doctor. He's worked as scientific and extra-terrestrial advisor to the UN before. Clearance above all top-secret on those matters."
"The UN has an extra-terrestrial advisor?" Sheppard asks in surprise.
Grodin shrugs. "UNIT's got records going back decades. The Doctor's in most of them."
"Cool." Sheppard says. "You include the Goa'uld?"
"Tend to stay away from that sort of thing." Jack and the Doctor say simultaneously.
"They're those Egyptian god-types the TARDIS was going on about, right?" Rose adds, reaching for a Jaffa Cake of her own. "Prefer intelligent trees, myself. They're politer."
McKay opens his mouth. "Intelligent -"
Grodin cuts him off. "Never ask. It'll only get you confused. So, ah, dare we ask what brings you to Atlantis, Doctor?"
"Fancied showing Rose and Jack what it was like. Pretty place. There's a good swimming area off one of the islands to the west."
"Fancy giving that bikini a workout, Rose?" Jack leers cheerfully.
"That bikini managed to cause a scandal on Zeta Forina, I'll have you know." Rose says. "Don't tell me, you just happen to have a speedo on you."
"The TARDIS put one in my draw, so who am I to disappoint?" Jack replies.
"She wasn't wearing the bikini at the time." The Doctor supplies.
Jack raises an eyebrow. "Now I'm interested. Tell me more, Rose." She swats at him again. They start walking in the direction of the hangar bay's exit, linking arms and deftly walking around the Marines with practiced ease. The Doctor smiles benevolently, handing the Jaffa Cakes to Grodin, tucking his hands into the pockets of
his jacket and following them.
Everyone including Bates starts to get that expression Grodin's all too familiar with around the Doctor. Confused and lost. Well, except for McKay, who's approaching indignant and is clearly torn between the TARDIS and the possibility of chocolate or questioning the Doctor more on alien things, and Sheppard, who's watching Jack's arse. Jack clearly has eyes in the back of his head, because he looks back and grins
the grin of someone who is clearly getting some. Grodin just rolls his eyes, takes a firm grip on the Jaffa Cakes and follows, hoping to keep the confrontation with Doctor Weir til the last possible moment. He sees himself participating in a lot of damage control
for the length of the Doctor's stay.
END
Title : Fairly Different on First Impressions
Author : Gunbunny
E-Mail : kabukivice@beeb.net
Fandom : SG:A/Dr Who
Pairing : well, er, there's ones hinted at.
Rating : No sex and no swearing. Am slipping.
Summary : Grodin really wishes he could escape his old job sometimes.
Disclaimer : Not mine. There's this American tv channel, and this corporation called the BBC, and this man called Russell T Davies who we fall at the feet of...
Feedback : I accept burnt offerings and alcohol.
Archive : http://kabukivice.com/fic , anywhere else feel free.
Grodin's in the middle of inhaling the scent of something Stackhouse's team brought in on their last mission. It's not tea, exactly, but it's as close to it as they've found. More Lady Grey than Darjeeling, but you can't have everything. One of his lot actually craves Tetley's, but they obviously have deformed tastebuds, since they're also well-known to crave Tizer. He couldn't really care less about the coffee that the science team craves, but he's fairly sure he'd sell his soul for a decent ginger nut to go with his tea.
However, he's interrupted from his reverie by a call over the tannoy for a security team. "Um. An unidentified object has just appeared in the hangar bay. Requesting someone to come look at it, please?"
"Coming over." Bates replies. "What are we looking at?"
"A, uh, blue box. It just appeared out of thin air with a weird noise."
Grodin almost chokes on his tea on that, putting it down before he spills it. He reaches over to the comms button. "Tell me, does it have a sign saying 'police call box' on it? And windows? Looks rather old fashioned?"
"Er... yes?" Whoever's in the hangar bay says hesitantly.
Grodin groans. He thought he'd left this kind of thing back on Earth. "Stand down, Bates, it's not a threat." He reaches up and rubs his forehead, as he can feel a headache coming on.
"How can you be sure, sir?" Bates asks, obviously sceptical.
"I've had experience with it before. Long, arduous experience. I'd stay alert, though, as it occasionally means trouble is coming. I'm coming down." He gets up, picking up his tea as he goes. He needs at least some reassurance for his nerves.
When he gets down to the hangar, Bates and a couple of marines are there, guns trained on the Police box. Zelenka and McKay are there, as well as Sheppard, looking curious as hell. "What can you tell us?" McKay says. "I'm getting some really odd readings from it."
"Put the guns down, they won't do anything." Grodin sighs. Once they're down, he walks forward and knocks on the door of the box.
At that, it opens and a blonde girl pokes her head out, looking curious. "Hi, can we help?" London accent.
She's followed by an extremely handsome man, dark hair, all-American looks, complete with grin. He looks around. "So this is Atlantis. Interesting." He steps out of the box,
extending his hand to Grodin. "Captain Jack Harkness. This is Rose Tyler. Hi."
"Hello. Peter Grodin." Grodin shakes his hand, distinctly feeling Captain Jack rub his thumb over the back of his hand. "May I ask if the Doctor is with you?"
Rose jerks a hand back towards the inside of the TARDIS. "Last I saw he was making a cuppa."
Grodin swallows. "Real tea?"
"Earl Grey." She grins on seeing his hopeful look. "There's Jaffa Cakes too." Grodin swallows. Jaffa Cakes are just *unfair* to offer to someone who's been cut off from England for several months.
McKay peers around Rose. "How can you fit even a kettle in there? It's a phone booth."
"Appearances are deceiving." Jack says, grinning again at Grodin, then noticing Sheppard over the way and giving him a smile. Sheppard smiles back.
McKay rolls his eyes. "Oh, god, two Kirks in the same space. Will the universe ever survive?"
"Hoi! Jack's not Captain Kirk!" Rose objects. "He's just a tart."
"Not saying anything?" Sheppard asks Jack.
"I'm flexible." Jack grins.
"What're you lot chinwagging about out here?" A Mancunian voice says from inside the TARDIS.
"Oh, just Jack being friendly." Rose says.
The speaker comes forward, lounging in the doorway. "Sorry about that, he flirts with everyone." Tall, rangy, leather jacket and big ears. The last Doctor Grodin saw intel on was fairly short and distracted professorish in trilby and suit, had a ruthless and
calculating streak a mile wide. This one looks fairly different on first impressions, but it's definitely the Doctor. He looks round. "Atlantis looks to have changed a bit since I was last here."
"When was that, then?" Rose asks.
"Ancients were still here. Very boring people, too concerned with ascending rather'n living life. Wore a lot of beige." Grodin's eyes stray to the packet of Jaffa Cakes he's holding in one hand, and the Doctor notices. "Want one?" He asks cheerfully, holding them out.
"Please." Grodin says, pouncing immediately, dignity flying out the window.
McKay stares. "...Are those Jaffa Cakes?"
"Yep." The Doctor says. "Want one?"
McKay looks at them longingly, mournfully. "Can't. Citrus allergy." He looks thoughtful for a second. "You wouldn't happen to have Cadbury's Fruit and Nut, would you?"
Rose shrugs. "Might have."
"When we've finished discussing chocolate, I want to know who this is." Bates states.
"Oh, sorry." Grodin says, emerging from his reverie over the Jaffa Cakes. "This is the Doctor. He's worked as scientific and extra-terrestrial advisor to the UN before. Clearance above all top-secret on those matters."
"The UN has an extra-terrestrial advisor?" Sheppard asks in surprise.
Grodin shrugs. "UNIT's got records going back decades. The Doctor's in most of them."
"Cool." Sheppard says. "You include the Goa'uld?"
"Tend to stay away from that sort of thing." Jack and the Doctor say simultaneously.
"They're those Egyptian god-types the TARDIS was going on about, right?" Rose adds, reaching for a Jaffa Cake of her own. "Prefer intelligent trees, myself. They're politer."
McKay opens his mouth. "Intelligent -"
Grodin cuts him off. "Never ask. It'll only get you confused. So, ah, dare we ask what brings you to Atlantis, Doctor?"
"Fancied showing Rose and Jack what it was like. Pretty place. There's a good swimming area off one of the islands to the west."
"Fancy giving that bikini a workout, Rose?" Jack leers cheerfully.
"That bikini managed to cause a scandal on Zeta Forina, I'll have you know." Rose says. "Don't tell me, you just happen to have a speedo on you."
"The TARDIS put one in my draw, so who am I to disappoint?" Jack replies.
"She wasn't wearing the bikini at the time." The Doctor supplies.
Jack raises an eyebrow. "Now I'm interested. Tell me more, Rose." She swats at him again. They start walking in the direction of the hangar bay's exit, linking arms and deftly walking around the Marines with practiced ease. The Doctor smiles benevolently, handing the Jaffa Cakes to Grodin, tucking his hands into the pockets of
his jacket and following them.
Everyone including Bates starts to get that expression Grodin's all too familiar with around the Doctor. Confused and lost. Well, except for McKay, who's approaching indignant and is clearly torn between the TARDIS and the possibility of chocolate or questioning the Doctor more on alien things, and Sheppard, who's watching Jack's arse. Jack clearly has eyes in the back of his head, because he looks back and grins
the grin of someone who is clearly getting some. Grodin just rolls his eyes, takes a firm grip on the Jaffa Cakes and follows, hoping to keep the confrontation with Doctor Weir til the last possible moment. He sees himself participating in a lot of damage control
for the length of the Doctor's stay.
END
